Episode 8 - Interviewing Verene: Learning the traits of a good listener

Inc Thoughts -

Here's the highlights of this episode:

How does Verene resolves conflicts as a good listener? Verene has been a mediator for various conflicts as she's widely known as a good listener. She notes that during a conflict, both parties can hardly listen from each other, therefore it's important for the mediator to understand both parties well to rephrase both party's message into something more acceptable by them. The key is to gain trust and agreement from both party before settling on a solution.

Verene prefers to be perceived as a calm person. Therefore she is able to built the skill of being neutral as a result. Being neutral is essential to be a good listener as it allows you to listen everything the sharer says without judging them.

Traits of a good listener includes the ability to be neutral, empathise and patient. The importance of being neutral has been stated in the previous paragraph thus we'll jump straight into empathising. A good listener requires to empathise because you'll need to see from the sharer's point of view to be able to understand the problem which they're facing. Being patient is needed because it takes time for the sharer to share his/her story. We need to let them know that we stand by their side by patiently listening to their story.

It's better to head straight to the point when you're sharing. While we talked about the requirements of being patient as a good listener, it'll help if the sharer can head straight to the point when they're sharing. A good listener will always asks questions if they need to know the details about your story. Verene actually experienced someone spending 4 hours sharing his story to her. As it happened during the night, she accidentally fell asleep as she was listening.

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